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Monday, May 16, 2011

Aliens and the Rapture,..

So I keep hearing rumors that the rapture is supposed to happen in five days. I am actually going to be real happy when that day comes. This is a multiple layered level of happy like a seven layer dip. First off I like the assumption of one person over another that they understand divinity and they believe they know best what "God's Plan" is. Second when the day comes and goes, I am going to point at the people left behind and say ha, told you that is not what it meant to be Christian buddy. Most of the Christians I meet are superficial two faced self serving douche bags that are only one religion or another because that is the church there momma made them go to as a kid. The last one is important to me on a more intelligence based, advancement of science basis. If people do disappear in mass the real ass hat fundamentalist are going to drink the Jim Jones juice so they don't feel they where left behind and the others left behind thought they where wrong. It will be an instant add of chlorine to the gene puddle.

The reason this excites me so much is to me a fundie is a fundie. Extremist in anything are dangerous, but extremist in religion are out right scary Windex drinking fucking retarded. We think about fundamentalist when we talk terrorist. They personify that. Someone willing to blow the fuck out of themselves because they believe so strongly that they are right and we are wrong that they are willing to prove they are right by blowing themselves and others up. Yes retarded logic. Well the terrorist guy is not the only one that is stupid homicidal about their religion. We have people in our country that are the same damn way. Look into the evangelist, and those dudes in Florida.

There is so much you are wrong, I am right bullshit going on. I just wish they would stop trying to measure their cocks on each others foreheads and dragging all of us into it. Extremist are extremist. So please be right about the rapture, and please let all those image conscience self righteous assholes be left behind, and those few souls that actually follow the intent of the teachings and not the twisted fallacy of the word find bliss with their God. I will start making cool aid for the ones left behind and start warning them the aliens will be here next, and wait for them to sip and slip.

Then maybe just maybe we can recreate the hell on Earth those fundies talk about. You know a school system that teaches actual science. I can not find one smart thing about intelligent design. Our space program has been neglected and could use a boost. You see we are so worried about prayer in school, and rejecting the concepts of what monkey we came from, that we forgot the future. Many people are unaware that our space program is still going on, they just assumed that the very scientist that they rejected for talking logic where still working on making them all the Tang and Velcro they could use.

Many people are unaware we are retiring the shuttle fleet and this Monday is the last mission that the shuttle Endeavor will ever launch on. We are not looking to replace the shuttle either. Lack of interest in the space program, and lack of funding because so many are worried about so much that doesn't matter that we are going to be surpassed by so many other countries when it comes to celestial activity that we all better start learning Chinese. So we can argue about putting prayer in church when we clearly see the line of church and state. It was drawn for a reason. If you like to see a successful theocracy look at Afghanistan before we kicked the Taliban out.

Incidentally Afghanistan had a shitty space program too, but they had prayer where ever you wanted. They didn't have it in school either though, because they didn't really have that many schools, after all everything you needed to learn you learned in church right. So on that note I say if you want a theocracy please enjoy your rapture. I am going to enjoy my schools, scientific method and the hopes of resurgent interest in our space program so we can find some intelligent life out there amongst the stars. For those of you left behind on the 21 with out the balls to do something about it, I am going to say keep the religion out of politics or prepare to have those churches start paying taxes, and those taxes are funding the new space program.

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