Don't bribe me, blow me.

Where do we start when thinking about today. You see there are things out there that you question yourself about. You see I just finished my first full round of VA comp hearings, and not to sure how I feel about it. There is so much smoke and cloudiness shrouded in bureaucratic obfuscation. So many people point you to other people to get the answers you need, after the person they pointed you too sent you to them. It seems that not many people have solid answers, yet they all seem to have a lot of questions. They also seem to have a habit of not listening to you as a person, but have no issues reading you off a paper. You become a number, a number they like to put into a problem and pass around and around so others can further complicate it.

You see I walk a fine line being in the Guard, and not wanting to get out of the Guard any time soon. As sick as it sounds I am looking forward to my next deployment. At least overseas shit makes sense, and things have a certain simplistic clarity. I like the simple concepts, and the fact that my survival is a focus more so then if I filled out form X in triplicate and signed in the seven spots with out going outside of the box provided. So the issue is what percentage would prevent me from staying in the Guard? No one at the VA seemed to have a clue, and talking the Guard with my reviewing physician was like trying to explain Greek to a whale, and I don't speak Greek.

So yes frustration and confusion reigned. The worst part is they don't get the conversation. I want to get better, I don't want to get paid. I want to be able to breath, or maybe have a consistent bowel? I pooped so damn good before this trip to the shit pit we call Iraq. Hell you could set your watch to when I was gonna drop a brown trout in the porcelain. I want to poop, everybody poops after all. Well everybody except a few dudes that came back from the sand box who now pee out of their butt more often than they can drop one solid peaceful turd. I know way too much information, but seriously that is what I want and I get the feeling these people are so fucking worried that I am gonna go out and destroy something beautiful for fun and entertainment that they want to over diagnose me, rather then just fix me and be done with me.

So I am looking at possibly being rated to high to stay in the service, but not really high enough to make a pension worth while, nor do I deserve said pension. I am still fit to fight. I have a mission coming up and I intend to join that mission. I intend to go out and enjoy that mission with some strong minded Americans. I fully intend to continue to do so for at least a few more years, and some whiny ass pussy is not going to tell me that I am crazy, or that they are not as concerned with the fact that I have not had a solid shit in seven months as they are with fact that a few nights in a month or two I don't sleep as good as I used to. So in that, yep I am pissed. I will get over it though and adjust fire and deal with things as the come.

You see the absolute waste of money. You see them throw money at you in an attempt to placate you, though I am not sure they understand my true intentions or motivations. If I wanted to die with a bank account full of green, I would not be pursuing a degree to be a teacher now would I? I think wealth could be measured in other ways, and I do not want to take their bribe to stay out of the news. I am not a disgruntled Vet that objects to the wars. I am not Jack's wasted life. I am Jack's complete lack of surprise.

I do not want a pension when I am still able to serve. I do not want to be pushed into a system of numbers, where I am nothing but a paper or computer screen read out. I am good at my job, and I can still do that job even if I can't breath, and my shit is substandard. So what I can't eat Little Ceaser's, Mc Donalds, or any other fat cow factory with a drive thru, they don't have to many of those in Afghanistan anyway. Just fucking fix me, don't throw money at me like a debutant having her love bought by her absentee father who is banging her nanny.

State of morality, or state your morality.

Okay so let me see here, not sure how to put this thought to paper without coming off completely like an ass. I mean more of an ass then people already think I am of course. I am tossing a few ideas about subjective morality. You see its about perspective this morality thing. We have issues, with have situations, and we have things that people look to for guidance. Yet how often have we look at morality as something all by itself.

Morality rarely ever stands alone. When have you ever thought about it in a context by itself? You got religious morality, fascist morality, and flavors for each of those groups you are a part of. You get the morality inherited from all of the people in your life that came before you. You get some there are just handed down because they didn't want to keep them to themselves. Its a collective behavior that has been twisted over the years to instill guilt. Catholic morality/guilt. What is the difference?

Why don't you sit your bon bon eating ass down for a second and try to define your personal morality? Think what part of your morality is your own and how much of it you hand heaped upon you? Now I am not asking you to do this because I want you to dump your morality. I just want you to think about it. Give it some real thought, and ask yourself at what point it became so twisted as to force you to do something you knew felt wrong, but your morality told you it was right.

I had some skirt tell me today that abortion was not moral. I asked her on what grounds, and by who's morality. She thought for a second and replied with, "God's morality" I of course asked her how she knew this, and how was she sure it was God's morality. I went on further for her to challenge that assumption, and asked her if she dared to think for her God. Where in the bible does it state that abortion is wrong, and further does it state in no uncertain terms when life actually begins? So where does that morality come from? She didn't say much after that. At least she looked like she was thinking.

So morality is a code of ethics, and I am not saying a code of ethics is a bad thing. I am just saying you need to understand and know your code and not just regurgitate it on command. If you are going to get pissed about something at least make it something you understand, have thought about, and not just the Shepard keeping the sheeple under control. Are they values you really know are right, or just something you were told you needed to follow and offer sound bites up on command when people challenge the status quo.

So before you stand back in line, I say question your reality and trust your moral compass to offer you a better glimpse at your morality. Or you can keep on chasing the over paid ass hats that don't care for you as a person, but value you as number 11578 in their congregation, association, or other group they use to support their validity by saying they have "X" number of members in their que ready for the slaughter.

expect the unexpected

Fuck expectations. Yep fuck em, and fuck em hard in the butt. You see we have expectations on things, relationships, employment, just about anything life throws at us, we attach expectations to it. Things can't simply be. We have to add so much to it that it is now about the expectation rather than the actual event, item, or thing we are there to experience. We place them on ourselves in back breaking piles. We hurl them at those around us like monkeys in the zoo. If this, then that. This is how it should be. This is who I should be with. If this happens then this must happen.

I joined the military and expected this noble order of warriors, but instead I saw the big green weenie. The greatest generation did a great job of hiding the grit, and reality of it. Hollywood let us know the bridge was to far, but with a close up and a grim facade we can make it. War was something that happened between gentlemen. There is nothing fucking gentle about it. It is war. The intention is to remove some other asshole of the burden that comes with the expectation of a continued existence. It is simply and primordially us versus them, and while the expectations are presented of an enemy that meets on the field with nobility seeking the glory of their cause, reality has a way of fucking that up. Instead we get ghost in the sand, remote triggers, iced mortar tubes and a life time of restless nights. Not the expectation, so once again left disappointed. That is the expectation, and that is reality. That reality is not happiness. That reality is duty.

The expectation of those in my profession is that we treat the injured. We treat those that need the care of hospital on your back. You carry everything you think you will need. You find that it rarely meets the expectation. You also have expectations of so many things in your head. You will treat these young men and women. You will save their life because you have this wonderful bag full of life saving shit. You will never have the exact thing you need in that bag though, that is the reality, not the expectation. The only thing you will have that you need is your knowledge, your hands, and comfort. Yep you are expected to not crack, no emotion other than humor. You are expected to be a rock to which the dying can anchor to. That is the expectation, and that is reality. That reality is not happiness. That reality is duty.

So many things hold so many expectations that we forget why we do them. I am a medic because I care for those that care for my freedom. They may not be the most noble lawful stupid people on the planet, but when they are bleeding they call my name, and I come. I treat them as best I can with no expectation. Them living or dying is not linked to my happiness. Being there for them is, and knowing I have done the best I can to keep them from the hands of the Valkyrie. I battle death, that is what is expected of me. I do not pretend to win all the time, I do not expect to lose all the time. My only expectation is that I will do battle with death. In that I find happiness. That is no expectations, and that is reality. That reality is happiness. That reality is duty.

I find that my standards are harder than what others put on me, but the difference is there is no expectation. You either meet your expectations or you do not. So there is less weight to my burden. I do not need to live up to the standards of others, why the hell should I? I am here in life to find my own happiness, not copy that happiness of another. What works for you, probably will not work for me. Just because its different does not mean it is bad. I can smile sometimes, just because. Why because I am okay with not being you, and I am okay with you not trying to be me. I do not need your words to tell me how to live my life. I have my own. I am not a pile of expectations. I am not a check list you can follow. I am me. Fuck you if you can't accept that. So fuck those expectations. I expect nothing anymore. I will do what I need to do, to be the best at what I do, and only I need to know what I am here to do. That is the expectation, and that is reality. That reality is happiness. That reality is beauty.

So you do not get to tell me what I need to do to be happy. You do not get tell me what makes me laugh. Just because you say that something is funny does not mean I find it so. If I laugh at something you should not feel obligated to mirror me. You do not get to tell me what is good. If something taste good to you, that does not mean automatically its my new favorite dish. Your relationship works for you, but it doesn't mean it has to work that way for me. I really do not care who watches me dance. I do not care who watches me cry. I am here to do what I need to do in this life and I do not need the weight of your expectations. I will not trouble you with mine. That is the expectation, and that is reality. That reality is happiness. That reality is beauty.

I am not a rock forever for the world to cling to, I am the earthquake when I need to be.

I am not the warmth in the middle of the cold night for you, I am a raging fire when I need to be.

I am not the gentle reassuring breeze you need everyday, I am the raging typhoon when I need to be.

I am not the soothing pool ready to take your trivial troubles away, I am the tidal wave when I need to be.

I am free from expectation. I am free.

Toil for oil and we all spoil.

I am not a huge fan of what is going on in Washington these days, and not just because of the politics that have been hated sense the dawn of time. It is not a new concept to be disgruntled with your government. Look over our history and you will see even during the heyday of American growth there was still dissidence. It is nothing new. I run the risk of sounding like a child when I say, "but this is different. It's much worse." With all the historical precedence it is hard to make that point typically. You see we have a President that stated he would veto the latest incarnation of NDAA because of the rider putting the stake in the heart of habeas corpus. When it came, no veto. The answer, "well it just would have been forced through anyway" How fucking Eeyore is that? Seriously we are Americans we fight for what is right, not because we know we are going to win, but because we know what is right.

With all of that rolling out though I have to say I agreed with a few things in the State of the Union. I am not one for speeches, most are just full of hot air and self endorsement. I also do not like the negative end of the world doom and gloom that came with the rebuttal. The role of alternative energy in our future is absolutely right though. We need to find something that we can use other than oil. Not just because of the impact it has on the environment. Not just because of dependency we have on oil. Not just because of the big oil companies pulling the puppet strings on the world stage. Not because of the conspiracy theories or the blaming it for all of the worlds problems. Not just to take away the voice of the middle east. I would like people to look to the next step, and let growth start over in America.

You see I am pissy about some hooker the other day saying the war in Afghanistan was over oil when there is zero oil production in that country. Not one damn barrel. I am pissy because it shows me that complete lack of education, and the acceptance of the crap we are fed and call it news. I am pissy because people like to blame their personal woes on oil, and my solution to bitching is to take away the excuses. When people are out of excuses they have to deal with their problems. So in looking for alternative sources several excuses go away, and our country moves forward. Win fucking win all the damn way.

You see those new jobs are going to need educated people. This is why our iPods are made in China, and not on our soil. Those menial task are beneath where we are now. We have to be smarter, and to build the new stuff. So education would need to be a focus. A by product of that is that hopefully people learn to think. They learn to engage in critical thought. Hopefully the status quo will fade away as they get smarter, or at least more educated. So its not just about oil, but it is about taking away excuses.

You see higher education, the pursuit of hard sciences also brings a bit of a conscience. You see we become more aware of the world around us and the ethical decisions as a by product. It is not to say we are better because of it, we are just more aware. There will still be douche nozzles that make poor decisions. Education can wash off the ignorance, but it takes so much more to wash away the asshole and douche-baggery. It does hopefully make people more aware of their own douche-baggery and therefore less inclined ot engage in such fucktardy activities.

The creation of these jobs will let people finally see through the smoke, or at least that is my hope. With knowledge they will learn the big three is not really a reference to companies, but the three largest smoke generators they use during elections to get you to vote emotionally and detract from their failings. Immigrants do not steal our jobs, unless you are a Native American. Abortion is a simple choice but used to control us. Even if you are a hard lined right wing Christian extremist I would challenge you to find one verse in the bible that speaks directly to abortion being a sin, or is it just a way that the church tries to regain the control it had in the dark ages over you as an individual? You also know how I feel about gun control, and with even just a little education people will see that its economics that bring violent crimes, not guns. Shit that is like blaming the spoon for your ass being fat.

So let us start looking for something else to use so big oil stops buying our government. Lets find something better so the uneducated liberals will stop blaming oil for all our woes and wars. Lets find something else to use so we don't have to listen to some chauvinist wrapped in a bed sheet with a huge beach for a back yard. So lets get smarter, lets get motivated, and remember why and how we made it to the moon.

cough cough where did all this smoke come from?

I think people are losing focus. We got issues, and those of us that are saying shit are being called crazy. Is it crazy to say that the Constitution is not about compromise, but sacrifice. Is it crazy to say that the great document written in a moment of genius never said anything about or even hinted at abortion? "The practice of abortion, the termination of a pregnancy so that it does not result in birth, dates back to ancient times. Pregnancies were terminated through a number of methods, including the administration of abortifacient herbs, the use of sharpened implements, the application of abdominal pressure, and other techniques." Wikipedia lets us know that it was an option then, by was it not an issue? Because they knew something we forgot. Its not that big of an issue when you are running a fucking country. Who gives a shit. You don't like them don't get them. You don't like red meat, don't eat it. Its that damn simple. Not every damn thing needs to be regulated.

I had an interesting talk about gun control today. While I had a friend of mine said there is no need for everyday common people to own assault rifles, he has a point. There is no good reason for me to own an assault rifle out side of going to the range to have a good time. Yep I like to shoot shit. Now people say that getting rid of assault rifles or making them illegal gets them off the streets and out of the hands of gangs. Passing laws to restrict the sales and make owning a gun a bureaucratic chore will some how make it all go away. The issue is not guns, but the alternatives we pose to our children. Economy sucks so you do what you can to make money. Drugs are easy money when the alternative is flipping burgers. So you want to stop sending up smoke screens when you run for office?

How about we talk about the meat and potatoes and address the issues that made this country great right out of the damn gate. You see our education was something the country decided was important a long long time ago? Why is that? Well it takes an education to drive an industrial revolution. It puts a damn man on the moon. It unleashes the power of the atom, and not just to destroy, but to heat a home and power a city. Those things were done by Americans and those Americans were Jewish, Christian, Agnostic, White, Black, Brown, all 100% American in drive, and spirit. It was a drive to learn and do something different. That "can do" attitude that we always hear about that damn time, and it did not come from a mass of people that were ignorant and lazy.

You want to fix whats wrong with America, get it back to being America. We educate our people. We draw that line between religion and relation. We stop letting people dictate to us how to run our life. We the people means that we stood up to tyranny. We stood up to bureaucracy. We wanted representation and not just in taxation. There was not hints early on of corporations being people. Nothing that says that for one person not to like something means that everyone else is not allow to do it. Nothing in the birth of this nation was about what a person can not do, but it was about possibilities and what we could do. It is not about forcing your will on another person, but expressing your own will on the world around you.

America was never about telling people what they can't do, but rather about the can do.

So as we roll into the future we need to think about this, and think about how we get our government back when someones greed bought it from under us? How do we get back to the hardest working nation in the world? How do we get back int he driver seat? How do we get back on topic and start talking about what really matters? What do we do to fix our education system? How do we teach our children how to be better people? How do we inspire them to embrace the real American dream? I am not talking about the house with the white picket fence, two point five kids, but the real dream? The real dream is closer to the one that Dr. King had. All men are created equal. While I am not about the distribution of wealth, but I am about giving everyone a fair shake from the start. That starts with schools. That starts with helping all of our children figure out their dream is, and helping them pursue it. Nobody says I want to grow up being a gun toting drug dealing dumb ass gang banger.

Being is doing

Nothing is sometimes greater than something. That I think is what I treasure most. Not so much the presence of something, or something I can hold touch or feel, but rather the absence of things. It is in this nothing that feel the greatest peace, and the greatest comfort. So many times we reach out for things, and push to acquire the baubles of life. We chase the best car, the perfect house, and get wrapped up like a mass produced cheese burger. We look at all the crap that we thin we need, and when we get it all we do is look for the next thing that we have to have.

What I mean by nothing though, is not just the repulsion of consumer based ideals. I am referring more to that state of Zen or enlightenment that our Eastern brothers and sisters talk about. I mean the absence of the static that fills our life. A void of even white noise, and that false promise of peace. I have found these moments in my life. One such moment hit me this morning. I was standing waiting for the bus, eager to go to school. The air was crisp and cold, but more importantly, it smelled like nothing. No exhaust, perfume, animalistic odors, or that boiled onion smell of an unwashed person. It did not carry the sweet scents of fruit, or flowers. No rancid piles of shit, or burning flesh. Neither good nor bad, just nothing.

In that nothing I found peace. For that moment when I inhaled the world had stopped. I was not being assaulted with choice or responsibility. It was not the comforting smell of fresh cut grass. It was not the memories brought on by the permeation of cinnamon touched fresh out of the oven, good old wholesome, American apple pie. No memory or desire tainted this moment. It simply was a moment and nothing more than that. Pressure rolled off my shoulders. Expectations drifted away ever so briefly.

It was in that I found the wisdom of "Office Space." The joy of nothing far out weighs the two chicks at one time. Don't get me wrong, the two chicks at one time is a great experience, one that I would recommend to all my friends, but that is all life is. It is a succession of experiences wrapping around us in a layer of over stimulation. They infect our thoughts, our hearts, and our minds until their is nothing left but the desire to contain, capture and recreate those experiences until all we are doing is looking for the next one. Rarely are we given pause to actually savor the experience of just being.

Life is a buffet and we are so concerned with loading our plates and filling our gut, that we forget to chew. We forget to enjoy the flavor. We forget so much, worried that we might not get to experience something in our life, that we forget to experience life. We get wrapped up in the sensation and rarely get to appreciate the substance. Everything has substance. Textures, feelings, tactile and visceral substance is everywhere. It is in all actions, even the ones we might not think about or enjoy. Sometimes you need a moment or two of nothing to appreciate the circus that happens everyday.

When there is nothing to do, or nothing to see, there is only you, that is when you can and will discover what really has value. There you will find the stories worth telling when you meet you ancestors again. It is then when you can find the things you really do need to do before you are done with this world. It is there that peace lays in wait. When everything stops, there is no distraction, there just is. That is all we really have to do, we just have to be. Its not about being good or bad. Its not about being evil or righteous. It is naught that is right, but not in the sense of right and right, but just in feeling right. It is what is important in being human.

Not everyone will get this.

Where does it all come from? What gives us the energy to get up and go out and do the things we do? What is the driving force behind our actions that keeps us from just wasting out lives away masturbating on the couch? By us of course I mean me. You see that is the joy of this blog, I do not speak for anybody but me. I reflect my views, and my thoughts, and you don't have to agree with a damn one. Hell you don't even have to read this. You are reading though, and that brings me back to the question at hand. Why do we do anything?

I wonder sometimes if we do things for approval, self gratification, or maybe a mixture of those and instinct. Seriously what is the motivation for people, and while I think there are several things that motivate people, can you narrow it down to one as the primary motivator. In doing so can you say something definitive about that person? If you understand their drive, can you take the driver seat, or perhaps know enough about them to warrant getting to know them better?

There are those that really need the praise of others, I mean really need to praise and approval of others. So far as to say that they will sacrifice their personal sense of identity, pride or well being to gain the praise of someone, or something. Typically this need is tied into issues of rejection early on in life, or a failure to get the attentions or affections of the person their new obsession represents. So they modify their body and/or their life to accommodate what they feel that other person is looking for.

These people are obsessed with being part of the right stream, more then they are concerned with being right. These are the majority of the people. We are raised and taught to praise those that step outside the lines, and march to their own beat. However we typically stop there. It is hard for us to see that we could dance to a different beat. We are quick to give praise, but seemed ashamed to accept it. We fall in line with the general belief system because we do not want to be the one that rocks the boat. We admire the Captain, but rarely are we willing to wear that hat.

Lets look at how we define those things in our life that matter. We define wealth with cash, but admire those with a wealth of love and friendship. We talk about love as the measure of a relationship, and get caught up in the taboo of sexuality. We praise those that walk outside of the social norms to declare their love, but do not want declare our own. When was the last time you did not condemn a young couple for making out in public, especially in a airport. When is the last time you made out with someone that was gone for any length of time in the airport?

We collar ourselves and seek outward praise from those that think like us. Why can't you seek praise from yourself and love freely. Your emotions are yours, enjoy them and do not be ashamed of them. ALL OF YOUR EMOTIONS ARE YOURS. If you bitch of a mother does not accept them does not mean they are are going to stop being yours. We get so caught up in what is acceptable and what is not, when we already fucking know. If something makes you happy, not vindicated, but happy, it should be acceptable. If it is dancing in the rain, or making mud pies on a Sunday afternoon it might not be convention, but it is right.

Smile more, you stress less. Do not repress you emotions. Do not repress your happiness based on how others tell you that you are supposed to live. Newton, Copernicus, Darwin, Einstein, and so many others thought differently and were not afraid to say it. They may not have been as interested in doing their hair, but I see a lot of pictures of those that where around when cameras were, and guess what? They seemed to be smiling a lot huh? So a ditch digger, a priest, or what ever failure job that society had in line for them could be yours. You could listen to yourself and see what doors you can open on your own. Maybe build a door of your own. So wear you striped pants with animal print, rock the fro, listen to Bach while you mind your garden based on color codes. Fuck the approving glances of others, and look for approval in the mirror. If not enjoy your wool coat, at least you will be warm? I am gonna go eat paste and celebrate my friends non conformist marriage while looking over the list of those in my harem. Hell fucking yeah I can hear the drums now.

Naturual Violence

Human nature is a great topic, I love what people like to assume about our very nature. Of course the conversation can sway to concepts that are completely human, like good and evil. In those we have other concepts that we group into good or evil. It is the ideal that is brought on by higher thought and reason. It is the ability to engage in the philosophy , or critical thought, that separates us from even the smartest of the animals. It is not just the trait of reason that makes us stand apart, but it is an obsession that enables us to stand alone at the top of the ecological heap.

We group, we put things into easy to figure out concepts so we can share our familiarity and base our decisions on them. We also use this reason and categorical process to divide our world into concepts of good and evil. We like to see things as good and bad, and not just good or bad for us as individuals, but good or bad for our culture or our herd. It is because of this we can accept certain things as universal truths and offer rational explanations for things that are inherent in our instinctual behavior. So like other animals, we protect our young, seek shelter from bad weather, and look for food. Attraction is based on reproduction, no matter how many times we are told a twig of lady is the standard of beauty. Yet we know that those narrow hips could not pass a child. Those lack of breast will not feed our young. In that we see one flaw of reason, or the ability to reason.

Some say things over and over again hoping that it will implant itself into your mind. As if saying it more then once some how offers truth to the concept. So we group people together and try to get more people into our group, because the more you say something and the more people you get to say it the more reasonable it seems to become. This is the flaw in behavior, and a failure of reason, when it is knowledge or education that offers more then just saying something is true. It is the tendency of the group mentality, a throw back to the herd mind, that tells us to accept the status quo though. It is then by saying our beliefs over and over, and hearing others repeat them that we can use rational thought to justify things that we have in the past considered evil.

So here we justify another part of human nature with the fortification of a shared belief. Here we try to cover up something people like to say is a horrible act. Here we justify violence on others, and in the next breath vilify violence and right it off as a monstrous or at the least an animal like behavior. We try to hide this flaw and call is something else, or declare it a necessary evil. In doing so we fail to admit the very nature of violence in the human condition. Even when turning away from violence, it still follows us, or lays ahead of us. It is engrained deep into what we call human nature.

We have examples of those we call enlightened and moving on a path of non violence, but in that path of non violence human nature takes over. It is what we like to think of as the lowest common denominator. You see if you have a group of people, it is a shared IQ, or level of education that is going to determine the effects of reason, or the level of reason available in a group or mob. I like the definition of a group IQ, where you take the highest IQ in the group and divide it by the amount of people in the group. This gives you the ability of the group to reason. It is when we go back to the "herd" that we revert to our baser instincts and are less inclined to attempt to use reason to resolve conflict.

For an example we have one great man, in Gandhi. Awesome dude, and one of the greatest thinkers of our time. While he preferred the path of nonviolence, the mob moved to violence or the threat of violence on his behalf. While it was not his intent to offer riots as a solution for his nation to enjoy independence it was an effect of his actions. It was not his intent, so we do not hold him accountable. However it was the thoughts of the population as a group or herd that moved to violence on his behalf. The very idea of civil disobedience is brilliant, but for the less of the rational thinkers of the mob, it is an invitation to participate in violence. Now understand I am not saying that Gandhi supported violence, but I am saying that the very nature of people made this violence in the form of riots inevitable.

Violence is easy, or at least the easier path. In some cases of others living a life of this ease, it is the only way to enact change on them. A good friend has said over and over to me that if all you have in your tool box is a hammer, all your problems look like nails. In that he is absolutely right, and with those of lesser rational thought, or less exposure to education you have to hit the nail on the head for them to understand. You get their attention with violence and then teach them about other tools and maybe offer them a new toolbox. You have to keep in mind though that we as humans are like water, and like to take the path of least resistance. So while we can have a tool box full of the right tools for a job, the visceral appeal of the hammer is always present.

To use the hammer less, you have to be better with the hammer, so those that only know the hammer might pause long enough to watch you use the other things in your tool box. You must also also understand that we are all given a hammer at birth, but we learn to use other tools as we grow and receive education. You can not make assumption on the abilities of others based on the groupings you have been taught in your own life, but you can talk shop and see what common ground you have. So you can build something for everyone to see, even if it only starts with a hammer, or you can revert to the herd mentality and seek destruction through a release to baser violent tendencies.

I am not saying violence is bad, it is human nature. Not just nature, but really a part of human nature. History speaks for us, with the rarity of the Gandhi's and Dr. King's, but the elevation of Patton's, Alexander's, Ceaser's, and Churchill's. All of them great men each with different tools, but we always seem to respect the hammer. As we grow we need to respect those that can create if we ever hope to grow as a race. We have to build on rational thought if we wish to accomplish more. We can reach for the stars, but we will never hold them until we learn how to build a ladder.

The middle is not nuetral

I am going explain my political views and my disdain for left wing ideas, and why the extreme right pisses me off as well. This is the reason I like the middle so much, and why the middle is my safe zone, where I think the idea of America can thrive. So maybe this will clarify a few things and help people figure out that extremes on both sides fucked in the head, and they need to stop forcing their idea of right on the world. That, regardless of the motivation, is tyranny. Tyranny is what many of our founding fathers spoke out against. It is the reason I despise the extreme on either side.

Okay we have all heard it, if you do not wish to legally own a gun, then don't buy one. The right answer is not to limit, control, or remove my ability to own a weapon. If you don't like it don't buy one. To simple right. Well this applies to so many things, for example if you don't want a gay marriage, don't get one. No need to outlaw them. Now I understand there is no need for the average Joe on the street to own a full automatic military grade weapons platform. Seriously you don't kill a deer with a 249 if at some time you would like to eat it. A shotgun protects your house just the same as that belt fed love machine would, and the shottie is easier to tote, clean, and learn how to operate.

Oh but what my right to form a well trained militia to protect me from the federal government? Before you ask that question again, ask me what I do for a living. I am in the Colorado Army National Guard. How is that for a fucking well trained and well maintained militia? Seriously it is not so each looney wingnut Jesus freak can open up a compound and hand out AK's and cool-aid. Having free standing armies in your own borders is not something that is going to maintain checks and balances, if anything it would make me want to beef up my guys to maintain the services the government offers. This is also why military weapons need not be in the hands of civilians, or at least readily. Then the local governments have to account that maybe those weapons are in the hands of criminals, so they have to become militant themselves. They stop being cops at that point, and there is that thing called martial law that scares the shit out of me.

So extreme one way or the other, just because you don't like something does not mean you should make it illegal. You do not like big business, then don't use big business. Do not outlaw Wal~mart, just don't fucking shop there you idiot. Also do not force your ideals of faith down my throat. If you want to mandate prayer in school I am going to change my religion to what ever religion would call for a blood sacrifice of a virgin every time I pray, and I must pray naked covered in oil. Then your dumb ass can deal with that. If you want to pray in school, just do it. You don't have to share it on prime time so you get the attention your version of a strip mall God is not giving you from CNN. Is your faith that weak that you have to flaunt it give it credibility? Yes I know the actual words "Separation of Church and State" do not appear in the Constitution but it does not mean it is not a damn good idea. I am not about telling you how you pray to God, and if your faith is true then you will manage just fine if the kid next to you is not required to pray. I do not support mega church shopping mall Christianity selling salvation every Sunday in a production that would make Hollywood pause in admiration. I do not move to ban them, if people really want wholesale religion let them have it. I just do not attend those churches, and my beliefs are my own.

I have a diverse cut of friends from a variety of religious beliefs, lifestyles, sexual preferences, and political affiliation. I do not want hang out with people just like me all the damn time. If I did I would never leave the house and spend my days masturbating telling me how awesome I am. I like the melting pot of America. I like learning about other people, even if it just to learn they are a closed minded douche nozzle. That is the strength of America, not a bunch of dill weeds trying to pass as many laws as they can to try and make me just like them. That is tyranny. I have been to countries that offer big government and state regulated religion. Typically we are at war with them dumb asses.

If you don't like meat, don't outlaw it for me. I don't smoke, but I don't advocate making it illegal. You want to kill yourself, then do it. You get to pay for your insurance at a higher rate then I do though. I don't smoke Marijuana, but that does not mean I think it should be banned for everyone. So instead of thinking of all the things you can make illegal, stop thinking about what you can take away from me, and show me what you can offer me. That is a government that motivates me to work for it, and protect it. This is why I despise big government. Handle it locally on the day to day. Let the big shit that crosses state lines be handled by the Fed, but outside of that let the locals handle their shit. Easier to effect your views on a smaller voting pool, then your one vote in billions to deal with stuff on a federal level. Even then your vote stops at elections of the official and then you hope they speak for you when they use your vote in a Republic. Democracy through representation. Right now though with all these extremes on either side of the fence, I do not feel I am being represented at all.

Because I do not agree with something does not mean it has to be illegal for everyone. I do not need the government to make choices for me. If anything the government should only put out true and accurate information and let me make the choice if I want to do something or not. The FDA spends time endorsing the food stuff genetically engineered products while telling organic local farmers they can not transport their wares across state lines. We are not the corporation that this country has become. We are not a nation of what we are not supposed to do, but rather we are supposed to be the nation that shows the world they can do anything.

We are the country that went to the moon. We are the beacon of hope for those oppressed in the world. We are supposed to be the reason they rise up. We are not supposed to be the ones to restrict the exchange of information on the WORLD WIDE WEB to simply protect profit. We are not the country the favors security over modesty in our airports. We are the country that bands together in spite of differences when others try to take those freedoms and liberty away. We are the country that because of our differences can and will achieve the impossible. This is why I am the extreme middle, and the other ass hats can shut the hell up and let freedom ring for all of the citizens of this; the greatest country in the world.

Wax on, wax off.

Today I came to a conclusion as I am plugging away at my school work. One assignment is to write a poem about our desires and wishes. Part of it is to introduce to the rest of the class who you are, and what are your dreams. In this I started to wonder what my dreams are and really give a deep thought to what I want to do with the rest of my life. I starting thinking about relations, aspirations, innovations, and all those things that give our life value. I polished a few thoughts I already had, and even found a few new ones hiding in the dusty cupboard of my mind. I found my personal goal in life and defined it in one word. That one word is not the definition most people would accept but it is my word none the less. That word is of course balance. I wish to be balanced.

I understand to be a good person you have to balance the selfish with the selfless. You have to understand yourself in order to offer something to your community. I understand that you really can not love others until you love yourself. I also understand the greatest experiences you can get out of life are those emotional moments. Good or bad, it is not just love, but also hate. Grief and joy color all the moments we remember, and it is memory that we carry into the next life. It is also those moments that we share with our family and friends, it is these moments that we leave behind. It is those moments that we can only hope they understand and learn from.

So in that balance that means you take the good and the bad. You have no options in this if you wish you live a full life. Think of the events in your life as polish. When you polish something you need friction to smooth it, and friction can cause irritation and discomfort. It is that friction that keeps us warm, it is the warmth of desire and pushes us forward. That irritation teaches us what lesson we need to learn in life, and in it we learn to appreciate comfort. This is why our desires change as we get older, instead of seeking those events and those life choices that cause irritation we look for those things that bring us comfort. You see the more polished you are the less you need to go out and shine. People get blinded just sitting next to you on the porch swing.

So in that I have figured I need a bit more polish, not because I do not shine enough, but because I do not shine as much as I should. I am not so worried about what others think or need as I am about what experiences I have yet to enjoy. So in doing this I can offer so much more from my family and friends. I also get to see how smooth I can get. I plan to be like an aged single malt scotch by the time I am ready for the porch swing. Right now I am happy just being a smooth criminal.

So lets not get wrapped up so much in the limitations that people like to place on you to fulfill their need to be rough and untouched when they die. I will let my judgment smooth itself out by trying things and listening to my gut tell me what is right and what is wrong. I am more apt to trust my polish then the rough untried surface of someone wrapped up hiding from life. No one remembers the quarry, but everyone talks about the statues. So you go gather moss, I am gonna go run around and enjoy life. I am going to do it on my terms, good and bad. I am not so worried about what the right wing conservatives feel about adventurous scandalous behavior, and I am not going to give shit about how the liberals feel about me not giving all I can to their cause or pool. I am breaking out from the herd, because I don't make wool, I make the sunshine, and the stars twinkle. I am a diamond in the rough.

Brain Shart.

I am back to school after the winter break, and looking forward to spring break already. I have my truck in the shop, and a few other issues I am trying to deal with. All of this as I prepare to head out the door again if the Mayans do not destroy the world like Hollywood would like us to believe. I am tackling the weight gain that crept up on me since I returned from Iraq. Already a few pounds down, and things are moving in the right direction. The issue I have right now though is what the hell do I write about?

I am in a photo contest to win a Snappy Cow T-shirt, and if you are not down with what that is get informed. It's an Army thing that became reality, and the story is actually inspiring. You got an Army lifer that started these little comics about Army life that are set up like Army style Power Point presentations, which is a special kind of hell for those of us in service. So this normally drab torture device became and instrument of humorous release. In that there is an energy drink called Snappy Cow. Now this same soldier who brought us the Good Idea Fairy, the loveable trailer trash Tiffany Amber, and so many other characters, made his fictional energy drink a reality. Incidentally this is the same guy that made the book "The Longest War" a possibility. So pretty happy to offer that guy some support and hopefully get me a free t shirt out of it. So go here and like my picture, the one of the sexy medic in his flight gear, and do both.

That being said follow the links, and enjoy a little slice of life I find very enjoyable. Now trying to find something else to write about. There is so much shit going on in the world that it is hard to focus on one thing to make the subject of a blog though. You got a chef pitching food that probably helped her on the path to diabetes cashing in on it. You got the South Carolina swarming with all kinds of democracy, and making me feel real positive about 2012 elections. TV and media pissing me off as usual, but thankfully some decent shows will be starting back up and I can enjoy having my brain sucked out through a straw again.

I mean really with all the crap going on what do you focus on, what do we talk about? So many dumb asses do so many things, and here I am waiting for some idiocy to rise about the others enough that I can put my ADD on the shelf and focus long enough to write about one thing.  I need to focus, but where and on what? Really who deserves my attention, or what can I say my peace on? SOPA PIPA and internet rights come into focus and then I remember that I might be considered a terrorist and end up spending time on the wrong side of the bars in Gitmo? Do I talk about the immigration laws that are destroying the country based on immigration?

So many things and so little time. So in the mean time I am going to look at unemployment and be thankful that I have the GI Bill so I have some income coming in. I am going to look at the paper and try to get some ideas for tomorrow. For now though I am going to try and get some school work done so in a few years I can move on to corrupting the youth of America if they actually make me a teacher. Out fricking standing huh? Angry white guy with a teaching degree? WTF is the world coming to.

2010 come and gone and no Opera. WTF

Dear World,

You suck. Just sayin. I have been an avid reader of science fiction, and have watched more movies in my life time then I should have. I have climbed mountains, and traveled all over the planet but I always give the red planet a second glance. The one thing that the movies and books established was a progression of discovery. Where are the flying cars? I want the Jetsons not Bladerunner. The progression of what I would consider viable technology has stagnated. The power of cell phones, computers, and visual entertainment have taken leaps and bounds. Yet we are still tied to the ground in a fossil fuel driven four wheeled fossil of its own.

Medical advancement has seems to have limited itself to traumatic resolutions, while cancer continues to plague those I love. The common cold still runs amok in the still gravity restricted play grounds that are not in anyway supporting the genius development of our children. Sickness though takes a back seat to obesity and self inflicted acts of vanity. Cybernetics have made a few steps in the right direction, but are a long way from offering us the ten million dollar man. Where are the clones? Why can I not drink myself to levels of stupidity, just to replace my defunct liver at the local Wal~mart?

What happened to our space program? Why do we not have at least a concept of a warp drive? Why do we not have some sort of baffling break through that offers us the chance to follow the adventures of Quaid on as he tries to enjoy a total recall of his real memory and not the non existent implanted yet cheaper alternative to the real thing? Where are the solar sails that are drifting our miners out to the resource rich asteroid belt where the fleet is being built to carry our colonies off to these Goldilocks planets that are just now being spotted, rather then decades ago?

I have seen the early formation of power armor and biometric control weapon systems, but we are still a far way away from Heinlein's vision in Starship Troopers, hell I would be happy with the offerings of Hollywoods water down craptastic B movie rendition. I have not seen a force field, and the Predator like camouflage is still only a concept that is rarely viewed on Youtube. How about those magnetic static attraction gloves that allowed crazy Cruise to scale the worlds tallest building, even if slightly faulty. A jet pack or two would be nice, even if it did not have a tracking system that sent information to my heads up display in my cybernetic upgraded eye.

While the Xbox kinect does offer a hands on control free voice activated computer system we are are still to far from a holodeck. Transporters are not even an option, or alternative to the complete lack of flying cars. So I am guessing it would be to much to ask for a voice activated house or seashells meant to confuse the social throw back Demolition man. I want to get dressed up and find my calm as I head off to Taco Bell singing my favorite Oscar Mayer jingle.

While the medical tricorder is not far away, I would still like to have the nanites coursing through my body to help seal and repair the trauma of life. Hell the foamy paste that was injected into the wounds of River Tam and her friends as the headed into the black would be more then enough to satisfy my curiosity. The evolution of the beta max to the blue ray would impress our parents, or maybe our grand parents, but our need to go to other places and dream of touching the stars seems to have slowed to a crawl. It seems that Event Horizon is taking a back seat to Idiocracy.

Regards,

A concerned geek that really is not liking the consumer based apathy that dares us not to dream.

First I would like to thank,..

Today was one of those moments when a thought takes shape, and that shape is able to be described and brought into words. I came to realize today why I hate drama, and what really is drama. Drama defined makes it easier for me to speak out against it without carrying the taint of the foul trappings of the melodramatic ass wipes. You see drama is people having the need to share things about themselves or others that we really do not give a crap about, until they bring it up and make it an issue. Drama is the people drumming up emotion around something that really has no value and had no value until they made you think it had value. It is the ultimate con, while they may or may not be after your actual cash, they do charge you a bit in social currency.

As the name implies, drama is an act. It is a show with all the fan fare of a true Hollywood product. Smoke and mirrors shade the truth and show you just enough that the lie gains strength. The production is an effort to gain an audience, for one reason or another, and the most popular reason is for self justification. That self justification feeds a weak and cripple ego. Some how they feel like they might be right if more people know about their plight, or the more noise about something, the more righteous the cause. When in reality most people could have cared less about their personal crusade to feel important.

The most annoying of the drama lama's even cause pain for other people, the physical pain is not that often, but their lies and presentation can cause pain. They get people to quiet working. They make people feel a shame they never even knew about. They destroy good things. They are the absence of love. They are the disloyal belly crawlers. They are the decay and rot. They foster the entropy that is the decay of life itself. They are as much of life as death though. The trick to warding off the decay though is understanding them and removing them like a disease from your life. In order to do that you need to have an understanding of how to find them, and discover the level that you are  willing to tolerate.

Me I have a very low level of tolerance. I shut them out when I first meet them, because I know to see them from the first step. There are people that just let you know that they are going to bring to much production into your life, and they do it in the first five minutes of conversation. Let us think about the people you have met in your life, and how many introduced themselves, and in the next breath or maybe even before they have to share something about themselves or their choices. For example, "Hi my name is Sam, and I loooove chocolate ice cream." Seriously WTF does their love off of chocolate ice cream have to with who they are, and why would they start a relationship off by telling you these things, and up until that moment did you really care? Now go one step further and say they went more this route; "I love chocolate ice cream and I really do not care if you do or do not love chocolate ice cream and you can not change my mind because it is who I am, and my name is Sam."

Now insert whatever lifestyle, career, religious choice, social crusade, or other designed issue that they wear in an effort to piss their parents off. Yep you are nodding your head because you know exactly what I am talking about. You know those people that try so hard to be different just like everyone else. They are out of place or make sure to be out of place where ever and when ever they can. These are your drama generators, these are the horrible weak people that are the harbingers of misery. I have no time for them and no desire to allow them into my life. I find a simple "Hi I am Sam." offers so much more, and the discovery is part of the human condition. So instead of presenting their issues to you like an offering, those stable people will let you find them out in do time and when they need to be found. Oh and some skeletons live better in the closet.

TeBlow me.

Today we are going to go with something light with some serious undertones. I am going to express my great level of joy after the game yesterday. Not because the Broncos lost, or the fact the Pat's won. Oh and they won, Brady looked like the picture perfect example of what an Quarterback in the NFL should look like. I was actually happy because Tebow was getting slammed down, beat up, and completed only 9 passes the whole damn game. Now let me tell you why this means so much too me; Tim Tebow is a fundamentalist that feels as a sport star he has the right to influence our society, but he is not really skilled enough to justify the attention he demands.

You see as a Quarterback Timmy really and truly sucks. His mechanics are horrible, he looks like a starfish aborting a fetus while suffering from explosive diarrhea when he throws the ball. The wobbly turds he threw in the air suffered from a special kind of seizure that effect flying pigskins. Even the few passes he completed looked ugly. Last week when people touted his praise, you watch the tapes and you will see the same things there. The difference is the Pat's were not going to let that high school shit go in the big leagues boys. Orton might not have been a showy or flashy quarterback, but he could do what a quarterback is required to do,... throw the damn ball.

People go on and on about how inspiring Timmy is. They talk about how he rallies the team and drives them forward with emotional resolve. They talk about how he pushes them, and how great a leader he is. I say bullshit. Leaders motivate sure, but its the dangerous leaders the appeal to emotions rather than leading by example, just look throughout history. Just because you take a knee and pay your respects each game to your God, who probably does not give a shit about a child's game being played on television meant for entertainment when there are so many other things that could or should require divine attention.

Now I do admire the kid for his ability to stand by his views. He is a rarity of people that actually live by their principles, and seems to really and truly believe. I may not agree will all the stuff that comes out of his mouth, but at least he is not out clubbing with crack ho's, shooting himself in the leg, or getting caught in a drive by. I have not seen him out doing lines of coke off a strippers ass, and yes he is a much better example to follow then so many other athletes we see in the news. That however does not mean he knows how to play football. Seriously people, what is the deal with this tool? He can't play football.

Now my biggest issue with this, would be the social pressure that not only got one guy fired, and put a third string no talent ass clown into the number one spot for a professional team. I am not a Bronco's fan, but I hear more about Tebag then I do about my own team. I see the pictures of so many "Tebowing" that to me just seem to offer a mockery of his zealotry. Imagine how you would feel if some NFL superstar that actually had some skills, threw down a prayer rug after every game? Spirituality is not the issue, or even his cookie cutter faith that expresses his ability to be a follower rather then a leader, it is his lack of ability that people seem to ignore because he does cute things after the game, and shares ideals that they feel they should have but do not have the conviction in their own faith to live that way.

You know why a lot of people do not have that level of faith that Timmy has though, its not an inability to be a believer in their religious philosophy, its intelligence forbids you. It seems people can only have this level of faith if they can lobotomize themselves enough to stomach intelligent design, or the other psuedoscience craptastic dark ages garbage the mega churches like to shovel out. Seriously I am not anti religion but I am anti mind fuck super sized corporate faith dispensary systems that Tim Tebow seems to be the spokes person for. This is why I am happy he got his ass pounded on Saturday, and I am so glad it came from the hands of a team wearing the red white and blue. Ironic and iconic, that the icon of the mass churches gets beat by the symbol of patriotism. That patriotism that is represented by the separation of church and state, personal liberty, freedom, and all those great things that make him so wrong and our country so right.

Piss off

I discussed this early on my Facebook page, and I am sure it will piss people off just as much here. In regards to that video that is being cycled around the net. Okay they screwed up, you don't piss on the dead bodies of people that were trying to kill you and your friends. Or at least you don't do it and get caught. Even if those same assholes would have filmed your beheading. Not because it is a bad thing, but because Hillary Clinton will use it to wag the dog. There are far worse things going on in our country and the world then to be worried about some dead people getting pissed on. 


War is not about taking the moral high ground, and I really do care more about them dismembering and torturing people. Like I said I might not pee on those ass hats, but they are my enemy and I understand what those young men did. Also this is an isolated incident that politicians are going to use to vilify ALL of the service members serving overseas. I can tell you not many soldiers, sailors, airmen or marines do this as often as they are going to try to say in the press, even if we do think about it. At the end of the day piss can be washed off and those corpses can be buried in a manner that has more honor then they deserve, while there are many bodies going home to the US over the course of the war missing parts, or so horribly disfigured that an open casket is not an option for their families. Not just because of IED's but because those fundamentalist assholes are pissed off before they got pissed on.

When you fight cowards, murderers, and just plain despicable that the liberal people try to paint up as oppressed freedom fighters, shit like this is bound to happen. Never mind the human rights violations under the Taliban rule. Never mind the attitude towards women, education, religious freedoms, or just out right anything that was not to their benefit? Seriously these are fucked up cut throat back stabbing uneducated savages that have done far worse to the bodies of people I call friends. Sure you can argue that we do not need to be there, but I say we do. That country or what we call a country, not what the Uzbek, Udari, Pashtoo or other native have ever called a country, is much better off than with that regime that was in place. So if once a decade something like this slips out, I am fucking fine with that. Totally fucking fine.

To the people bitching about it, how about they try standing up and defending the rights that allow them to try and make these guys out to be the next Hitler, Qaddafi, or Bin Laden. They pissed on the bodies of people they killed that would have killed them. They did not defile their bodies, parade them through the streets, behead them on international television, or prevent them from being buried in any fashion that would be against their custom or religious beliefs. So fuck those politicians trying to cry foul, none of them have drawn a line in the sand and stood ready to defend it. I am sure that far worse came out of Vietnam, either of the world wars, and I even seen worse with my own eyes in other places around the world. Not typically done by our guys, but still fucking done. So wash their bodies off with those whiny asshole's tears, and move the fuck on, or get in a humvee spend some time over there doing what needs to be done before you can talk shit about pissing on anything. 

How about we stop trying to draw attention away from this isolated incident, justified or not, and focus on something that matters. You want to get into a pissing contest? How about you fix the tax code? How about you work on the economy? How about we deal with unemployment? Maybe the housing market could use a look? Maybe the ethical issues going on in the very seat of government? Hell I feel like I am getting pissed on every time I watch the news and I am not even dead yet. So stop pissing on my back and tell its just rain, and let those Marines and Corpsmen get handled by their commanders, and stop trying to distract us from the real issues going on at home. 

I am a bit upset about this if you can't tell. Right or wrong, not matter how you feel about this pissing incident, really did it take away your job, foreclose on your home, or prevent you from getting health coverage for a preexisting urinary tract infection? If not why don't we ask them to go back to the real issues and fix that shit. I am far more concerned with shit than I am about piss on a dead guy that really needed to be dead in the first place. 

A pound of flesh,...

I see the news, I see the trends, and I watch what others are saying. So yes I am trying to take the pulse of the world around me. With all that I am going to say something real simple. I am a fat ass cow. Yep, not the self loathing realization though. I am not saying I want to kill myself, or am I embarrassed to look at my flabby white ass in the mirror. I am saying I am fat. I know why. It bugs me, yes it bugs the shit out of me, but I will say it. I am fat. I am not big boned. I am not the product of my society. I am making an effort to correct it. I like being fit. I hate being fat.

I see so many people putting pride in their body, which is cool I guess, but misplaced. I think you should have pride in who you are, not your weight. If you weight is not a healthy weight then why the hell would you be proud of that? To me it is like being proud that you can go months without a shower. Being proud that you keep your word, or maybe that you are raising some smart kids would be something to be proud of. The fact you can not see your genitals while your standing is not.

I am not saying that a person that is over weight is any less of a person then somebody else, I just do not understand why someone would be proud of that? Look I like people because of who they are. I like them because of the things they do. I like them because of the value they bring to a conversation. I do not run over to them because of the amount of calories they consume during a day, or the lack of calories they burn. I am saying that I will admire a person for what they do, but I can not understand the pride people place in their midsection.

To me it is like idolizing Joe Camel. It is a bad habit. Its not healthy. It's not something a person should be proud of in anyway. I do not think a person should be afforded special rights to accommodate their obesity. Movie seats, airport seats, or even park benches should not be altered to accommodate someone. It is a health concern that should not be surrendered to. I know where my weight gain is coming from. I know why in the last three months I have acquired 25 pounds. I also have a plan to lose it. Running is not an option just yet, but I still have a plan. I am going to put less in my hole until I can burn off the fuel.

I know this probably going to piss a few people off, but I support insurance reduction for people who exercise. I support employers establishing gyms for their employees to reduce the cost of the health care plans. I am all about people getting into their high school jeans. I am not about the size zero bone models that need to eat a sandwich either. I am about being proud of being HEALTHY. I am about being aware of your body. I am about taking pride in the things that make sense. So before people get their panties in a bunch I am not saying you are a shit brick because you got some weight on, I am jsut saying I do not understand how people can be proud of it.

I am not proud of my beer belly. I am not proud of the extra weight. I will be proud when I can see my abs again. I will be proud when my blood levels show healthy levels of cholesterol. I will be proud when I accomplish something, not when I do not accomplish something, or when I accomplish something that is negative for me. So I am not discriminatory based on weight, I just do not think that weight is the basis to establish discrimination. On that note should we offer protections to video gamers? Smokers over non smokers? Sorry this how I feel.

So now that I have pissed a few people off I am going to end this rant and see what happens later. So to all my fluffy friends, I love you, but I would be happier if you were healthier. Odds are if you are healthy we can spend more time on this earth together, and that I am sure would make us all happier. Shit I know hanging out with me is pretty damn awesome. As awesome as I am it says something if I choose to hang out or even talk to you. Now that is something to be proud of.

Make amends or build a big fence.

To start today's blog I am going to shamelessly plug a book. At the beginning of the next month a book called "The Longest War." will be available for sale. This book is a compilation of stories from soldiers and their family members. Forty five authors contributed to the pages, yours truly being one of them. Pre-sales will start soon, so get your copy reserved. You pick my contributions out and I will sign it with something witty, rude, or the style you guys have grown to know and love. Click on the title for the Facebook page and follow along with the progression of this soon to be New York Times best seller. Oh and this is how you support your troops, not with some lame ass magnet attached to your fossil fuel guzzling foreign made consumptive icon to your personal greed. Over fifty percent of the profits will go to veteran organizations, and the bit the authors make will be going to veterans and their families. How fucking awesome is that?

So now back to the business of my personal rants designed to improve my writing ability. Today I want to discuss a topic that has been brewing in my mind, and attempt to give it form and function. This is my idea for the 28th Amendment. I truly believe that something like this could correct the issues with our government and quite possibly restore the vision of our founding fathers. You see they wanted a government for the people and by the people. They wanted a functional republic that would insure individual freedoms and not be repressive to life, liberty, or the pursuit of happiness. It was not intended to be a country of wealthy persons lording over the peasants. That ideal of divine right was what they wished to counter.

So in that I believe that right now those with money have a bigger say in the business of our country then the masses. They are able to support their candidates economically in ways that the average Joe could not possibly hope to offer. On top of that, winning an election is akin to winning the lottery and establishing a precedence of lavish lifestyle that many a young child would dream about. It is no longer about civil service, but the ultimate room service. How do we eliminate that greed and corruption and prevent even the possibility of the perception of corruption in the eyes of the people? Simple you take out the ability of those in office from receiving excessive profit from that office, or offer debt for themselves to those in the positions of wealth and power.

How the hell do you do that? Well you start by amending the Constitution and revise the rules of election. First we add a small tax, or increase the amount you the tax payer can offer to a campaign pool of funds. No outside donations will be allowed, and all candidates that are qualified and on the ballot can draw equal sums of funds from the pool in proportion to their role in government. No outside funds would be allowed, and ads run by third parties would not be allowed to use the likeness of a candidate they are looking to represent. No more pac's or fund raising events. No candidate would be able to "buy" an election because they would all be allotted a fix dollar amount based on the persons in their voting area. For example a member runs for the Senate and has a population in their district is limited to a set amount based on the population. So id they have one million registered voters and the amount is set at twenty five cents per voter, they would have two hundred and fifty thousand dollars to spend on their campaign. While the Presidential race would have a much higher budget being that they have to reach or get exposure to the entire population of the country, but would be at the same rate of say twenty five cents per voter.

Now I would accept that tax increase to fund this election pool if it means that my elections are protected from outside persons trying to buy or win influence for a representative that they helped put into office. I would go further and say that the persons in office should have their personal assets frozen until their term ends, and would live to a standard that is appropriate to their elected station. Ergo the president would have a clothing allowance so he can present himself as a well to do leader on the world stage, even though he and other members of the federal government would have no access to their personal wealth. I would also limit their salary while in office to that of the national average of salaries or no more then 10% more then they pay the highest paid person in the military? So while it is a reward to serve your country, it is no longer winning the lottery and limiting access to those of great personal wealth.

These are my thoughts. Not much, and just taking form. They are not written in legalize or that great double talk they use to close up loop holes that most of us of good morale fiber would never think to abuse. It is a thought though, and seriously gaining steam in my mind. So if you would like to share you thoughts on the subject please do. Help this become something that maybe one day we can present to those officials to let them know we do not have patience for their greed and abuse anymore. If I wanted to live in a corporate controlled government I would read cyber punk fiction. If I wanted your church to tell me how to live I would go to it. I love this country though because we have the opportunity to even think about change like this.

Burn the midnight oil, or fill the gas tank; the choice is yours.

It has been a busy last few days. Life has a funny way of telling you it is not a good time to rest. An object at rest tends to stay at rest though, and a lack of motion can lead to stagnation. Stagnation is the first step on the path to extinction. I am not ready to join the thunder lizards yet, nor am I willing to let my blood be drawn from the earth to feed the greed of nations. So for now I move, and I keep moving. Through it all I try to remember to smile.

In this my smile is not always sarcastic, however I do not stop that sly smirk from taking over my face. You see the superciliousness that brings my mirth to the surface is one of mocking discontent for the masses. So many people want nothing more then to be left to their own devices. So many people would love to spend their days collecting a bigger belly on their couches with nothing more to do then to enjoy the sweet embrace of apathy. It is the story as old as time. Achilles was offered two choices in the Iliad, one do not go to Troy and live a happy life with many fat children but his name dies with them, second he could choose the path of glory and his name would live on for millennium. We all know his choice.

Many call that choice folly, yet here we are thousands of years later still hearing of his tales. We hear of his people, and those sweet words of Homer pull to that sense of adventure. We all dream of those great tales, and often in our youth we put ourselves in them. As we age though the call lessens in our heart and our mind looks to preservation. We want nothing more then to squeeze as many days from life as we can. We stop looking for the journey and slow our arrival at the destination. We favor stagnation and look to wrap ourselves in the bed straw of 401k's, retirement IRA's, Roth's, or annuity based funds. The most exciting thing people seek would be a sunset, and forget that years ago this was a fate worse than death to that child within.

Strive for stagnation and you will find extinction. Life is not the reward of the complacent, it is merely existence, nothing more. Life is held by those that understand it is the currency of adventure, and by putting it on the line you are paying the fare for the best rides you can find. It is the sailing to a distant shore to try new flavors. Life has a lot to offer to those willing to live it. Excuses are easy, life is not. So what have you done to challenge your life and to ward of oblivion and the stink of the void? When is the last time you danced during a sunset from a mountain top?

Life is about motion, choice, and renewal. The by product is change, and change is nothing to be feared or loved; it merely is. So do not run from change, it will catch you, and the longer it takes the bigger the price. If you take it on in small doses you will not live forever but you will actually live. That is the secret to life, at least in my eyes. We all die. We all breath. Some of us just get much more out of it. So when you are sitting at a table in the afterlife with your ancestors what stories are you going to share, or are you just going to listen and carry your extinction over to the other side?

Me I am going to seek as much, do as much, and cause as much as I can. Eternity is a long damn time to be telling the same tired stories over and over again. You might as well insure yours are the least boring. Go, do something, and don't let a damn person take a thing from you, and take take any of their shit either. Live, love, laugh, and you will live longer then your body ever could.

Missed the mark?

So as I stated yesterday the 20k mark is pretty close. With this post and the weekend ahead it will happen in time when I am not around and unable to get the net. It is still going to happen though. That brings up one of those life lessons that I like to share. I know many of you have figured out some of the stuff I put up here, and many of the things are more of a record of the thoughts in my head, it is still fun to write and share. Yep sharing, its something we learned in kindergarten, and it can make life better for a lot of people. So in looking at what I have going here I a prepared to share a real simple observation. Shit is going to happen regardless if you are there, regardless if you are ready, or regardless of your awareness.

That is the joy of life, is even if you die, it will still go on. Things are going to happen to you, for you, and even some caused by you when you are not around. Inaction can make these things happen just as much as action, but sometimes its better to put things in motion so they are not a total surprise to you. You see it goes back to that talk earlier about making stuff happen in your life, or letting things happen to you. No matter how hard you try to prevent it, things are still going to happen. It is the action of life. It is even one of those laws that scientist talk about, and that dude that has a tasty cookie named after him. The fig Newton. Things in motion tend to stay in motion right? You tracking?

We put things in motion all the time and are still surprised when the momentum builds up. I love my single man whore friends that go out and shag like a bunny and then act all surprised when they find out they are going to be a daddy. Better odds then Vegas by far. That is the bonus though, children are awesome, but that karma shit can be a bitch and sometimes you just get the itch. So no bundle of joy, but rather some strange growth on your body, or that warm sensation like you are pissing napalm. Shit happens folks, and if you are in motion shit is going to happen more frequently to you.

Now there are other issues out there that are not good or bad, they just are. Its that whole equal and opposite reaction. These are those things that happen in life regardless of what you try to do about them. Those wonderful things beyond your control that season the flavor of life. In the reaction to these people are measured. Seriously how many of you want a hurricane to hit your home, or a mudslide, earthquake or Tsunami? If you could control that stuff you would have a comic book, but they still happen. It is how we react to those things that shows the world who we are. Do we turn into a sniveling ball of gelatinous self pity, or do we move the fuck on and make lemonade?

So I guess what I am saying here is that stuff is going to happen in your life that you have no control over when it does. There are things that you set in motion and could have prevented or improved. The wisdom is knowing the difference, and I almost broke into that serenity prayer. That's not the one the Captain Mal says about the turbulence, but rather the one the coin collectors say to keep them from drinking. Its solid advice though even if you are not an alcoholic. So it would work. If you can't do shit about it, and you could not have stopped it, don't carry the baggage, just adjust fire and move the hell on. If you set things in motion, take responsibility good or bad, adjust fire and move on. Either way move on. Life will move on regardless and if you can't keep up with life's pace, well that my friend is when you are truly screwed.

You don't need to be there for life to happen either. You don't need to be there to see the good things that life does in your name. You don't have to take credit for all of it either. Responsibility is all you have to keep in mind. Own your shit. Own up to your shit. Even if you don't life will go on, it just seems to go smoother if you do. So enjoy yourself, educate yourself and I will see you on the other side of 20k!

Woof woof hookers, woof woof.

Watching the news yet again, yep horrible idea. At least I move around form station to station to get the pulse of what both sides of the fence are thinking. We are out of Iraq and now the news is running reports on the daily bombings in that country. It is not much of a change when we were there, yet now the news finds it important to tell us about now. I say fuck it, let them keep taking each other out as long as they can keep it contained to their own borders right? We have bigger fish to fry. I also really feel that it was a good idea to leave Iraq, no sarcasm at all. I got the impression while we were there that we were no longer wanted and the majority of people were not willing to accept help or guidance. That is a nice way of saying that they didn't really seem to want to change, so fuck it let them kill each other.

Yep makes me a dick to say that huh? Well that is a issue that is going to be thrown at you this upcoming election. These are the issues they are going to use to sway your vote with ad after ad. You are going to be bombarded with interviews, news articles, debates, and all the marketing BS that is going to sell you on a label. So grab your donkey or elephant pin and your funky fresh new ass Nike pumps with your iPod and get in line consumers, soon you are going to be told how to vote with an onslaught of buzzwords and some wag the dog issues that are going to make you dizzy.

One big topic that you will see come to light will be the prochoice/prolife. It happens every year and it is a measure that typically prevents Democrats from voting on Republicans, and Republicans for voting on Democrats. First let me say this in a clear and concise statement, Rode vs Wade was upheld as Constitutional and is the law of the land. If you are against abortion educate people to the pro's and con's all you like, but it is protected by the rights of a woman's body and the right to choose. This means that you have the choice to not get an abortion as well. For those on the religious right, I offer that even God gave you free will, so why should you use law to restrict that freewill that he gave you? Are you saying that you know better then your God? Seriously you can make the choice that includes not getting an abortion, so this is not even an issue. It will be brought up though to sway opinion. At the end of the day what effect would it have on jobs, foreign policy, or the improvement of our country?

Next you are going to hear things about the economy. You are going to hear that each candidate has a plan to improve the economy, but rarely are you going to actually see the nuts and bolts of those plans. First off saying you are against unemployment rates being high is like saying you are against infant orphans breathing toxic gas in a sweat shop so they can be turned into golf balls. Of course they are all against a weak economy. So don't let the get away with saying they are going to fix the economy without telling you how. I mean hell I could balance the budget, but people sure as hell would not like it. Nor is the instant balance the smartest idea, so get the details or blow it off as bravado.

People talk about a disconnect with the people, well shit look at who is running or has run. Not a damn one of them is what anyone would consider one of the guys. That is not what makes a president. A president is suppose to be a larger then life leader. Also how the hell is some trust fund business tycoon that would be hard pressed to prove one year in their working life that they made an average income? I would find it interesting to see how many of them have actually ate mac-n-cheese, or top ramen in their dorm room because it is all they could afford after getting books?

I recommend you really think about what issues are really important to you and bring those up. Not just to the president, or the presidential candidates, but all those other people running for office in 2012. Look into their records as to how they actually voted on those issues you found important, not just what they say in a speech that was designed to gain your support. Look to the record not the recording. See what how they want to fix the economy. I suggest you see how they interacted with foreigners and what legislation they have voted for in regards to foreign policy. I sum it all up as what role woudl you allow them to have in the life of your children? Would you let them babysit, teach, or even treat your children? Or would you get a restraining order and call them a pedophile, because that is what you are doing. What they do in office today will establish the country you want our children to inherit.