Today I woke up in my own bed. It was nice. Though it was creepy to have come home to, and woke up to an empty house. Its funny how that familiarity can bother you form time to time. It is funny how how those noises that annoy the piss out of you most days, and missed when they are absent in totality. It has been oddly comforting though.
Last night I went to an old hang out. I saw a couple of old friends. I was ignored by a few others, or at the very least waved off with indifference. The part I found humorous though was a great effort on my behalf to not piss off my wife. There was a person there that had exhibited so many traits that I do not like in a person. You know all those things that I admire the least in people. One person who is friends with a lot of people I know at this particular establishment.
I was thinking yet again about familiarity and its role in our life. People see people, and those people are in and out of our life with regularity, they become familiar and therefore on time alone they build themselves into the fabric of our family. We tolerate them, simply because we are unsure what we would do without them around. We ignore flaws or serous character flaws and just brush it off and say something like oh that was just so and so.
The worst habit we have as humans though is to believe our own hype. We say things about those people maybe even in a joking matter, and then we start to except them as the solid truth. Even when the light is shined down on them we ignore what we see and replace it with the reality we have created. It is funny how when people are confronted with that, how quickly they become combative.
So with that thought look at the people you know. Look at the people that are in your social herd. Decide if they have a place in your herd because they have just done time like its a prison sentence, or because they have earned your trust and affection. The only reason I say this is just because the guy who sits next to you every night for years does not make him your best friend. In most cases it just makes them a stalker and not the hot sex in the shower while one or more of your tied up hip breaking sex cleans out your garbage can with love kind of stalker. I am talking the rabbit in the pot, cut up genitals, eat your mothers soul kind of stalker.
We do this to ourselves all the time. We allow these people to ease into our existence like that chick with the mist and the gorillas. Eventually those primates accepted that lady as one of their own, just the hairless weaker then a child can not contributed to the survival of the tribe nobody wants to mate with weird food eating not particularly useful part of the tribe. It is what it is though, and we all do it. At least I did. Now I just cut the dead weight. I do not cling to numbers of friends like a badge of honor. I count those I want to count as my friend, and I do not count you as a friend just because you have managed to hang out in the same places as me for a few years. Now actually I get my guard up more and look at those people, because why would they feel the need to become my friend that way, rather then earn it like I do for so many others.