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Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Forgot to name this one,..

Today its kind of hard to think about what to write about. I am doing my best to not write about people that piss me off. So I was thinking about writing something about something else that pisses me off. There are a lot of things that piss me off. So that is what I decided to write about. Why is it that I get pissed off at things.

I want to start this off by asking a few questions of the people that do not allow themselves to get angry. What is wrong with being angry? What is wrong with expressing emotions? You know more people into trouble over the more "positive" emotions. Love causes more trouble in our day to day life then anger ever could. So why do you deny anger? Also anger if contained has a tendency to blow up like a Peter North money shot. Then it is all over you face and all over the place and not easy to control.

Anger gets a bad rap as a negative emotion. People are afraid of anger. Anger can turn into hatred, and it can consume people. Well love does the same shit and if that is not caught you turn into a stalker. More people have lost houses over love then anger, yet we encourage love to run around all stupid happy. We have babies having babies because of our cultural fascination with love. Love is not what keeps your kids in line, its a swat on the ass. So where do you think that comes from?

I get angry rather easily, the reason for this, I am not afraid of my anger. I do not let it control me. Even if people think it does, I can assure you there is some deep rational, and even calculating thought behind my anger. I freely express my anger so it does not sneak in one day and grab a hold of me. There are so many things in this world that are worth getting angry over, just as many if not more then things you can express love towards.

The trick is just like anything else is to moderate, monitor and control anger. Then it is your tool. I know I have talked about this before, but apparently people like to ask questions without reading other blogs, because they are lazy, and while that makes me angry, I control my anger. I address those children and instead of saying look back and read more, I write more. I am not angry because they made me write or gave me a subject. I am angry because they are the norm. So many lazy bitches out there. So see its okay to be angry if you know how or why.

I don't trust people that do not get angry, or I can say I don't respect them. Why is that? Well its simple, if they are not angry they are not paying attention. Politics, religions, global or even local news, modern media, North Korea, China, there are so many things out there just waiting to piss you off. If you actually get involved in life, instead of immersing yourself into denial, you will find anger a willful companion in life. Train it, and don't give into the Green Machine lying in your heart. Bruce Banner was an asshole. You can experience anger without becoming a total asshole, I just like being an asshole. Its the opposite of shit, it actually keeps the fly's away.

5 comments:

  1. It's ok to be angry if you don't know how or why. It's not a state I prefer, but I groove that it's a natural thing. I am an angry person. There are more things in this world that just piss me off than there are things that don't, but that's alright. I use it to get things done and I move along. What I can't handle is people who choose anger over constructive fixing. I find anger to be constructive. I work well when I'm angry, but I find that a lot of people will blow up, ignore the irritating side effects (Such as pissing me off), and then walk away only to come back a few hours/days/whatever later and go on like nothing happened. I suppose that falls under use it don't let it use you. Still, I find that far lazier, and far more irritating than people who don't get angry at all. Don't ignore the bullshit in your life, usually of your own creation, let it get the better of you, and pour it down my throat. It's much more common that I had *nothing* to do with it than it being my own fault. I'll take it if I caused it. Otherwise, STFU.

    And love. Oh. My. God. Love. Nine times out of ten, the person talking about love has NO FUCKING CLUE what it is. They say love and what they mean is co-dependent, or scared, or lonely, or horny, has no self esteem, or can't afford rent on their own, or, or, or. I could go on a rant about sex being so taboo that it forces people into relationships or marriages, but that would take twelve years. Instead I'll just snarl and leave it on this note. When I was 23 (TWENTY THREE!!!) my mother sighed at me because I had broken up with yet another boyfriend and said to me, "Cameron, when are you going to stop looking for Prince Charming?" I looked my at usually sane, moderately Fem-Nazi mother and was blown away. Of course I replied with, "When I find him? Why the hell would I settle?"

    Love. Ugh! There's a reason it took me this long to get married. I waited until I was absolutely sure and then a little longer. He's not perfect, and he's not always perfect for me, but he's willing to improve himself with me, and supports me improving myself when he doesn't always agree with where I'm going. That counts with me. Someone who's willing to grow and build, not just coast. And who'd've thunk with the guy I ended up with. :)

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  2. I love the "They say love and what they mean is co-dependent, or scared, or lonely, or horny, has no self esteem, or can't afford rent on their own, or, or, or. I could go on a rant about sex being so taboo that it forces people into relationships or marriages, but that would take twelve years" run on and on sentence. You are so right though. I am thinking this fixation could be the source material for a few more blogs. Hell you should write a few, because I know I can count on you for comments as long as the blog if I write them :)

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  3. Someone I learned from all the Psych classes I took in college (lord! there were a lot of Psych classes!) is that anger is actually a higher emotion. The base emotion (or the root of the anger) is actually fear. Now, I'm talking real anger here...not just the day-to-day aggravations, such as a fly buzzing around your head that gets on your nerves, or that you've dropped and broken a dish and now are irritated that you have to clean it up...I'm talking about anger in the sense that it could spark rage (on whatever level). As a result of this knowledge, when something really gets my ire up, I try to dig a little deeper and figure out what the base fear is. The whole political shit storm that makes me wanna punch government in the face is actually my fear that I am gonna lose my freedom. I'm afraid if we continue to be complacent and just allow government to run amok, I and my son will no longer be able to enjoy our lives because our freedom is gone. Losing my freedom scares the hell outta me! Thus...my higher emotion of anger is spurred. When my last real relationship fell apart, I was furious that he left me for a much younger woman. What's my base fear? My fear is growing old, and being all alone. The anger was actually secondary. The fear was the REAL emotion. Mind you, again...I'm not talking about the little aggravations and annoyances that once they stop, they are gone forever, along with the emotion...I'm talking ANGER. When my son does something truly bone-headed, and I get angry, my real concern is that he will screw up his life and not be the things I want for him: to be happy, healthy and safe. That's why the little things just roll off and the big things become an issue...the difference in the base fear as opposed to no base fear. I agree with you, Jesse, that there should be no stigma attached to expressing anger. Anger can be just as healthy an emotion as love or happiness if expressed in a productive manner...such as being so pissed off it spurs you into action to make a positive change. The problem comes in when people react adversely to anger and do something DEstructive - such as hitting, destroying, becoming abusive, or turing to crime. If our society would teach how to deal appropriately with ALL emotions, rather than to teach us to suppress them, we would be a healthier nation. Suppression of anger can manifest itself in our physicality. Hypertention, ulcers, digestive disorders, headaches, cancer, cardiac arrest...all can have a basis in poorly manifested emotional disorders. We, as a society, have become so narcissistic we are unaware of how our personal behavior effects those around us. Therefore, our rude, insensitive, inconsiderate, self-serving behavior has an entitled nuance to it - the: it's okay for ME to act this way, but it's not okay for YOU to act this way. Some folks think the rules don't apply to them. For those of us who DO consider others in our personal actions, and take personal responsibility, the rude (read: stoopid) people spark our anger. Base fear? I'm afraid that our world will be over-run by these stoopid people and I will be at the mercy of their stoopidity. Stupid is contageous. And it's spreading at mach speed. There's a global pandemic of stupid. I fear the stupid. And it really makes me angry.

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  4. Fear being the root of anger, being that if you act upon that anger in a rational matter, is that an act of courage then? I do get angry. I embrace that anger and I make it mine. I use it in a rational way, even if other people do not see that. However I do confront the source of my fear/anger and address it. This is a trait I see most people cower away from, because of the negative association with anger. I respect people that can not only identify the source of their anger, but those that let themselves feel the anger, and address it.

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  5. That anger is the action part of something gone wrong in our lives does make sense. I would say its similar to the idea that Pain is there to tell us something is wrong and to take action. The lesson for me is that because of the extreme amounts of pain inflicted to me as a child my body has adjusted to that level and now my tolerance is high. Some people would say "oh your so lucky you don't have to feel the pain" but I say no I am not. Because I don't feel it as easily as others I am not alerted when something is wrong and therefore don't know to take action to fix it causing more injury. Anger is telling you something is amiss and needs to be addressed and those who have either become numb to it or was told to suppress it because "anger is bad" are going to cause further injury to themselves and others if the underlying issue isn't addressed. Learn to work with your anger to fix and/or change things in your life.

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