So yesterday was an interesting day. I learned a bit about myself and the world around me. It also started another one of those internal debates that has not resolved itself yet. I have it narrowed down to two paths I might take. Well there is a third on that is still on the table, but that one is mostly joyous violence. You see their is this douche nozzle that knows a lot of the same people I know. I have seen the true face of this no talent mooch master, and I do not like it. Recently he attacked a friend of mine in a email, so I gave him a piece of my mind. In the last week we where out at an event in public together and he decided to take a big drink of Windex, because window lickers like the flavor, I guess it is their tequila. At this event he was the subtle back biting manipulator he has always been, and never stepped out directly. He made sure I understood it was me he was talking about though. He basically tried to call me out, and did so in a way that if I did confront him, not only would I be insulting our gracious host, but also making him look good.
So I actually ignored the bait. I let it go. Since I have been back from Iraq this moron has been at a few of the same events as me. I have taken the policy of not saying a word to him. I really do not wish to give him any more effort then he deserves. Yet I also see him hanging out with people I call my friends, and I know what kind of a person he is. He is not openly malicious to them, so he is still welcome at their homes. He has not tried to hit on their young women yet, which is something that has made him unwelcome in other places. He has not outright used them yet, and I do not think he has begged for his supper with them yet either.
I hate this guy. I do not hate a lot of people but I hate this guy. He actually personifies everything that is wrong with the male image today. He would rather mooch and pan handle then have a job. As a matter of fact he actually put more effort into projects that could only be described as con's on the net, then he did in looking for honest work here. Now I am okay with consenting adults getting together regardless of age, but this guy likes to prey on the young ones. When he catches them in his claws he uses them up only to cast them off, and makes them feel like it was their fault. He is deceitful and good at it. Not many people get to see his true face, and he hides behind a bullshit facade of honor and integrity. He has not of either.
You see honor is something earned, not something that is claimed. It is something people feel towards you, and that can be used like the currency of trust. To be know as an honorable man means that you can do business on a hand shake. Integrity is one way to get honor, but to me is more of a way to live life. Integrity is doing the right thing even when no one is watching. These can be faked, and he does that well. It pisses me off to no avail.
So that third course of action is, if you have not guessed yet, would be to pommel him into the dirt. This one would bring me the most satisfaction, though my friends that have not seen his face would not be very understanding. He is Loki to me, the great trickster, and not in the cute way people like to think of it. He would plot the death of another, and use others to do it, out of spite. This is why ending him before he could would bring me satisfaction. I am not opposed to this type of violence, but I am afraid to do it, because of the level of satisfaction I know I would draw from it, so it is not a real valid option. I mean who would not want to kick a pedophile fork tongued user in the face?
The second course is the one I am currently on. The path of Buddha is heavy on this one. It is one of control and restraint. If and when I do see him, I just ignore him. I do not let him stir one emotion on the outside. I do not speak to him, nor respond to his words. I will let others decide for themselves about him, and give them time to see him on their own. I bite my tongue until it fills my mouth with blood and ignore his efforts to bait me. I know why he does it too, because he wants to be the martyr in public, so I will not give it to him. I have dealt with his kind before. Other people like him hide behind the words of another pedophile and put bombs on the side of the road and run planes into buildings. I will not give him what he wants. However if he does keep poking, I will catch him alone and the previous option might just become the one of choice.
The final option to me is a bit childish, but it might be effective on several levels. There is wisdom in the heart of five year old after all. I was thinking of a simple social ban. What I mean by this is that informing my friends that I will not attend any event he is at. If he shows up at an event, make it very apparent that he is the reason I am leaving. This could do two things, either make him unwelcome, or even help me narrow down the places I want to be. I really do not feel comfortable with this route, but I have not ruled it out. Like I said the guy is a good liar, and I am trying to be the better person. Not just to him, but for myself. So I do not share all of my encounters with the public.
Yet some of them have seen him work his mojo on a sixteen year old girl, him very much in his forties. They say things to justify it, like she is close enough to eighteen to make her own choices. Or my favor response is the bitch in private and ignore in public method. I am not even sure what this trickster has to offer them the forces them to look the other way, or is it the fear that most of any confrontation? Do we tolerate those that have not hurt us directly, or refuse to see the truth about them because of a fear of confrontation?
Not understanding the reactions of others, I personally am still trying to do the right thing. I am not one to preach the evils of another, I prefer people make up their own minds, and if wonder if they just do not see what I see? And if they do see what I see, but it doesn't bother them nearly as much, do I want to hang out with them anyway? So this is my dilemma. I am trying to stay on the higher ground. I am trying to be the better man, and I also do not want my friends to be hurt or even annoyed by this ass hat. Sometimes is sucks trying to be a better you, and not in a good way.
This is fabulous, Jesse. Too often people are afraid to stand up for what they see is wrong...even you just talking about it is a step in taking action against something you feel so strongly about. Good for you!
ReplyDeleteClose enough to eighteen doesn't make it legal, doesn't make it right, and in no way makes it something you keep quiet about. Do the right thing, right? Law says ten years if you are under eighteen. The right thing to do is stop him. He shouldn't be granted the right to continue preying on young women by the people around him. And yet... he is.
ReplyDeleteYou know there's another way. You know enough loud mouth do-gooders who are exceptionally good at dealing with this sort of thing. In ways that lead to him being jailed as opposed to him being dead. Although, kicking a pedophile in the face is always satisfying. Find a credible... wing man for lack of a better term, one who is outside of the situation, and let them blow the top off of it. You don't put your friends in a bad situation, you don't put yourself in a position that might trigger the need to kick him in the face, and you don't get to look at the next sixteen year old girl and say I let that happen. Win fucking win.
I hear you ladies, and I guess my major issue with this, is that I am not to sure if I am over reacting. Nobody else seems to have troubles with his behavior, nobody else in our community seems to even notice, and when I have spoken out against him the past, I am the douche bag. So maybe I am over reacting, I do that. I have seen what I have seen though, and I find myself doubting myself though because of how other people react.
ReplyDeleteThe worst part about my community supports him because of a meet up he runs, and the showing up he does at events. So maybe because he offers so much to the community they turn a blind eye? I am not sure. He also spends a lot of time bashing the very same community that shows him so much support. He calls people out for doing what he does, and he comes off as a fucking hero.
I think you are struggling with a couple things. First, your urge to provide justice as a result of your anger. For this you are choosing wisely to follow the Buddhist path. It will cloud your judgment on the other three things if you succumb to rage.
ReplyDeleteSecond, your uncertainty on how to deal with his illegal behavior. To a certain extent, 16 as "close enough" is somewhat understandable. I remember 16 and I was smart enough to make some stupid choices that I had to learn from. On the other hand, the law exists to help protect kids from long term consequences. The fuck-tard you are talking about is exactly the kind of person the law exists to protect against. You should do whatever it takes (legally) to expose him to authorities. A phone call expressing what you've observed would be a good start.
Third, you are struggling with how to deal with the people you know as your friends who are passive on his behavior. Dump them. If they are too socially deficient to avoid direct association with him then your relationship can't have much meaning. You are likely just another number that they can use to say they have the most "friends". As readily as they defend him they will turn on you because their loyalties are to something other than honor and integrity.
Third, don't let him dictate where you go or don't go. Walk boldly into the same room with him knowing that you are superior and HE is the one who should scurry into the shadows like a cockroach surprised by the light. Of course, extend that same courtesy to your friends. They may be caught in third party associations as well and in the same moral conundrum as you.
As Loki was oft seen to do, he would let slip his actions and brag on them. I have to admit that I have not seen the behavior describe and that is probably due to what would have already happened. If you have examples then by all means spill them and let us denounce this useless person before I put an axe to him!
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ReplyDeleteDecember 13, 2011 -- [Witch Way] Volume #4 Issue #7 -- It's Beginning To Look A Lot Like Yule!
ReplyDeleteAnd here we have a defense.
Personal Responsibility should also include taking responsibility for people talking about you based on your actions and how they appear to others. Not caring enough about how you conduct yourself, even if you may be innocent, creates damage and opinions of you that never go away.
Shame on you lying pagans for talking about this "priestly" man who never did anything wrong or questionable!
And what a great defense. Seriously why even bother posting this here, and anonymously at that. The pity me attitude does not change the facts and what others have seen with their own eyes. If you are caught breaking in to someones house, does not mean you are not a thief. It just means you are not a very good thief. So in the case of the "priestly" guy here, him not getting caught or not actually being taken up on his offer does not make him less of a lazy lecherous pedophile with a bad comb over.
ReplyDeleteUhm....That last comment about the lying Pagans was supposed to have an line at the end and somehow got taken off the post. I am actually AGREEING with you and my comments were aimed at Mr. Priestly and HIS responsibility. :) Very sorry it didn't come across the way I meant it to!
ReplyDeleteI choose to be anonymous to protect myself. I will contact you in private if you wish and identify myself.
Sorry about the mix up!